Shifting thyroid gears?

Trying to research hypothyroid symptoms and treatments while experiencing one of its most common symptoms (brain fog) is so frustrating.
I did find some information on reverse T3 and T3 resistance. Medical mumbo jumbo is very hard to sort through even on my optimal days but currently I am in such a haze that it makes little to no sense to me. I think I will have to print it out and take it to my doctor at next week's check up. It might not apply to me but it can't hurt to ask. Changing my prescriptions and dosages hasn't helped so far. I feel like my brain is in reverse but maybe it is my thyroid.

Where have I been?

I have been here.

Kind of.

Not really.

Spacey.

Tired.

Lethargic.

My thyroid is out of whack big time and I have had a heck of a time updating my Facebook status coherently much less trying to write .

Sigh.

My kindly doctor straight up doubled my dose of Cytomel so I am hoping that helps bring me out of the fog!

Achieving fitness through faith : Part one

Achieving fitness through faith : Part one

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Leaves - Haiku

falling gently down
swirling colors, season's end
covering the lawn

Extreme Enough Makeover

When I began my foray into the world of freelance writing I knew a few things: it would be difficult, I wouldn't get rich (darn it!), writers block is not a myth and I would face distractions.

I try many remedies for the above thorns in my side and not surprisingly the biggest one is distractions. A husband, two kids and a Great Dane share my house with me and do not respect my ''cone of silence''. That is what I call it when I am on my laptop. Bribery, begging and threats did not make a difference.

Drastic times call for drastic measures right?

That is what I convinced my husband of. I am taking over his weight room. Gasp! I never thought I would see this day but I am thankful that he is willing to give it up to support my writing efforts.

I bought the paint and brushes. Deep red and mustard seed. I am going for a Moroccan/Indian feel. I hope it turns out how I am envisioning but even if it doesn't at least it will be quiet!

The Newest Member of Our Family

Meet Caden! We adopted him through the Rocky Mountain Great Dane Rescue this summer.

I was never a dog person. My kids wanted a dog for years but I was totally against it. The smell of wet dogs, dog food, animals in general made me gag!

My daughter and I were enjoying the Papillion Days parade and a few of the volunteers from the rescue were walking Danes in the parade. Curious about these huge dogs I took my children to a meet and greet at an Omaha bookstore, then the dog show, then the book store again the next month. Soon we were filling out the paperwork and on our way to adopting a gentle giant of our own.

Part of the adoption process includes a home check. We already had the dog picked out on the website that we wanted to adopt but when the volunteers came with their foster dog Caden to do our home check all thoughts about another dog disappeared.

After the home check and the foster parents took Caden back home with them it was an agonizing two weeks before the process was finalized and he came to live with us permanently.

**Check back soon to read how Caden adapted to our home and how we made room in our house and hearts for a 130 lb Great Dane!

Badge of Honor

I put a new badge on my blog today. Blog With Integrity is a movement of the ''mommy bloggers'' (sounds better than ''soccer mom'' doesn't it?) to declare when they are giving positive spin to products they received for free. Gasp! Isn't that the way it is supposed to work? It is but apparently many bloggers weren't disclosing the fact that they were paid or received something for their blog post.Ahhh, there is the difference.

I haven't received free stuff because of my blog but I have received freebies from websites. My favorite is House Party! This is not a sponsored review and I can tell you they give great free stuff.

If I ever do get something for free because of my blog then I am certainly not going to be shy about it. Woo Hoo! I will shout at the notion of people liking this enough to send me freebies!

I like the idea of Blog With Integrity. When I am looking for product reviews I always assumed they were honest reviews but now I know that ''sponsored reviews'' are common place and not a clear,unbiased picture of a product. That is like if I ask my husband if my jeans make my butt look fat. If he knows what is good for him he won't tell the truth. Bloggers don't want to bite the hand that feeds them so they only give a thumbs up to a product. Even with the new ''Integrity'' movement it still remains a case of buyer beware.

Not Everyone Is A Winner

Today I was trying to rush my six year old out the door. For anyone with any experience with a six year old knows this is like trying to rush a turtle. She can't decide what to take with her, dog or doll? Where are her sandals? No, she wants the pink ones not these purple ones. Finally I say loudly and emphatically ''LETS GO'' to which she responds not with speed of course but puts her things down and starts cheering. Oh for heaven's sake I say to myself!

'' LET'S GO! LET'S GO! LET'S GO TEAM! GO!

LET'S FIGHT! LET'S FIGHT! LET'S FIGHT TEAM FIGHT!

GO! FIGHT! LOSE!''

Chuckling I tell her it is ''go fight win''. She looks at me like only Laramie can and says

''But Mommy, someone has to lose so I am cheering them on."

This makes me grind to a halt. I don't want to rush her anymore. I want her to stay this little and this sweet for as long as I can.

38:49

On a typical day for me in 38 minutes I can vacuum the house or do dishes and clean up the kitchen but this past Saturday I ran 3.1 miles.

(OK jogged interspersed with walking/sweating/praying)

I crossed the finish line in thirty eight minutes forty nine seconds. Shaving my time down from the 5k I did last Summer by nearly SIX minutes. Not to bad for a chunky gal. I need to lose forty pounds, I would be thrilled to lose twenty to tell you the truth.

(sigh)

The next 5k I am considering doing is August 9Th. My goal is to finish that in as close to 38 flat as I can. I am hoping these races help me lose weight but if not at least I will be more fit than if I just sat around moping about my XL butt. Being in a race with people all around makes me push myself a little harder and makes quitting not an option.

Doggone It

Today an older neighbor lady came over and introduced herself. She found a tiny stray dog and wondered if he was ours. My son fell in love with this dog as soon as he laid eyes on her. I told my new neighbor lady we would take care of the dog until we found its owner. Being unfamiliar with our neighborhood still I can remember seeing many people out walking their dogs but haven't figured out which dogs live it which houses.

We don't own a dog. Never have.(We will soon though and are adopting a Dane through the rescue) I didn't know where to start. Maybe she was thirsty? I gave her some water but she didn't seem too interested in it. My son and I took the dog into the backyard and luckily my next door neighbors were out on their patio. Bev saved the day. She whipped out a portable kennel, dog biscuit and some kibble type food. The little puppy liked that. I put out a sign in the front yard that said we have a found dog and then went inside called the Humane Society and then posted a pic of the found pup on Facebook and Craigslist. Bev is a dog person though. She has a shitzu and used to show dogs. She knew the right thing to do. She rode around the neighborhood looking for people who looked like they were looking for someone. She found Gracie's mom. Way to go Bev.

The mom was glad to have her puppy back but I think my son would have been thrilled to keep her.

Walnut Creek Park

Inspired by a new friend who has been doing the three mile loop at Walnut Creek I decided to give it a go. Three miles is not daunting to me since I semi-regularly force myself to do it on the treadmill at the gym. This distance is very different outside. Without my Ipod I have difficulty keeping a steady pace. The trade off though is hearing the birds, ducks and geese as I enjoy the wonderful weather.

I hadn't walked this trail before and was confused by the forks I encountered on the path. I arbitrarily decided to always keep to the right. I walked from 4:22pm to 5:14pm. It sure felt like three miles. It felt like three miles after just thirty minutes! I was confused by the people ''lapping'' me though so I stopped and asked a safe enough looking Dad with his kid. He looked at me with pity (I must have looked worse than I felt!) and he cheerfully told me I was on the right path and I was halfway there! The first person who ''lapped'' me was a shirtless guy on inline skates with a mullet and goofy grin. At first I thought he might have been one of the Bay City Rollers but as he whizzed closer by I decided he was much too young. The second person who ''lapped'' me seemed rather pleased about it. Miss Spandex seemed kind of smug as went by but considering she wasn't breaking a sweat or jogging I was guessing either she was on a different path or employing a Lycra covered time travel device.

I usually prefer airports and post offices for people watching but there was quite a number of people enjoying the path as well. I encountered a jovial, shirtless, sunburned , septuagenarian gentleman as well as several joggers, bicyclers, stroller pushers and dog walkers. One lady I passed was so thin I was surprised her skeletal legs held her up. She seemed to be in her forties and when I said hello she balked and looked at me like I was her worst nightmare coming towards her. Given her anorexic appearance that very well may have been the case. The bicyclists were the friendliest, followed by the dog walkers then the stroller pushers. The joggers seemed to intent on not dying to be very social.

I haven't been to the gym much in the past couple weeks so I was not ready I guess for packing and cleaning all day in anticipation of our move in four days to end the day with a three mile walk in the heat. I had my cell phone in my hand and was ready to call for pick up if I didn't figure out my way off this trail soon. My feet hurt and I was wishing that I was in a pedicure chair getting my toes pampered. Then I was wishing I had water with me. My mind wandered while I finished my walk unsure if I was headed in the right direction. Then I wished I had been looking where I was walking as I stepped in goose poop. Icky.

As I crossed the damn I spotted the parking lot and my car in the distance. I was so happy! So relieved! I wasn't lost after all! The last half mile felt like nothing since I knew I wasn't lost after all.

I enjoyed the walk along the path. The scenery, fresh air and being out in nature was refreshing but there is something to be said for the gym and the trusty treadmill that has a cup holder and no goose poop.

I wonder what she dreams about.

I miss being a kid and playing until I was exhausted.

Does she realize how lucky she is to have a Grandma close by with a comfy couch to nap on?

Praemonitus praemunitus

Translation: FOREWARNED IS FOREARMED.

''BUYER BEWARE'' is another good one.

Why am I thinking of quotes this morning? Well, because yesterday I thought I had a stellar day on my diet. Healthy, low calorie, low fat , high vitamin breakfast, church then out to lunch. I thought we were going to Macaroni Grill so I knew I would order the Pollo Magro which is one of their least calorically offensive offerings. They were not open though so we went to Chili's. I ordered the Quesadilla Explosion Salad. It was good. Rather tasty. Sure it came with a smallish quesadilla but the chicken was grilled and it wasn't drowning in dressing. After lunch we went to the park then hit the gym for 25 minutes on the treadmill, yoga class then swimming with my daughter which isn't actually swimming but just splashing around. Healthy dinner and a good nights sleep. All good stuff for the perpetual dieter.

Back to the quotes, I am meeting a friend at Panera this morning so I looked up the nutritional information so I can order wisely. Panera is the devil's den when it comes to calories! After figuring out what I should order there I decided for the heck of it to look at Chili's website.

Ouch.

1260 calories and 76 grams of fat! For a salad! Of Chili's salads the Quesadilla Explosion is actually the worst one a person could order if they are trying to cut calories.

Next time it is Runza for the Southwest Chicken Salad. That one is tasty and under 600 calories.

I learned a very valuable lesson though. When it comes to going out to eat I am definitely going to look before I leap!

PARTING IS SUCH (ARTIFICIALLY) SWEET SORROW

I gave up pop. For those of you not from Nebraska or the Midwest usually refer to it (incorrectly, I might add) as soda or soda pop and for those who know me know I was rarely seen without a diet pop in my hand. For years it was Diet Pepsi then in an effort to curb this habit of mine I switched to Coke Zero. That didn't help, I loved that stuff even more! The more I read about soft drinks I knew the cans I was chugging down each day were not good for me. One look at the back of the can at the ingredients told me that.

So I did it.

Cold turkey even!

The first few days I was a bit on edge after that it wasn't affecting me physically but habits are hard to break. I had to make an effort to order tea. It has been nearly a month now and I haven't fallen off the pop wagon once. I still miss its bubbly sweetness and pathetically enough I even had a dream that I was drinking a can of cold carbonated bliss. If I was still in high school I probably would be drawing hearts on my notebook with doodles of Coke Zero.

I wish I had this much willpower when it came to dieting but going completely without diet pop is somehow easier than rationing it to a reasonable amount. It wasn't easy and I wish I was drinking one right now but I have to say that I do look and feel better now that I have finally gotten myself off the sauce.

The Things We Do For Love (and out of guilt)

I am afflicted with COULROPHOBIA. For those of you who know me don't panic. It is not fatal (most likely).

Coulrophobia is the fear of clowns. Don't laugh, I can't help it. Those red nosed freaks give me the willies!

Because of this I never took my son to the circus. Yeah, I know, take away my Mother of the Year trophy. My sister took him so at least he got to see it and we discovered that coulrophobia is not hereditary. He is sixteen now and I think he would have ended up to be the same kind of kid whether he went to the circus or not. Now his sister is six and my husband is guilting me into taking her. Ugh! He insists he can't take her alone in case she has to go to the bathroom. Not the best reason to make me face my fears but he does have a point. Last summer we actually got into an argument over this because I would not cave and refused to go.

GUILT GUILT GUILT

Fine, lets get this over with. I bought the tickets online tonight. Here is her one shot of going to the circus. I hope she enjoys it. I hope the cotton candy is ten bucks too because my husband is going to pay for this!!

Quiche Me You Fool

Racking our brains for something nice but different to serve my mother this Mother's Day we finally decided on quiche. A good decision for a chilly Spring day. I printed out a recipe. Well, the ingredients part printed but not the rest of the recipe. I didn't tell my husband that I just sent him to the store for the ingredients. My husband does not bunt well. A very linear (and sometimes annoying) thinker he is. Now he is frazzled. I try to reassure him that it is quiche not nuclear fission and surely it will come out ok. Then we disagree on what to add to the quiche. Now we are making two quiches. His and hers. His has kielbasa, red peppers and cheddar cheese. Mine had onions, spinach and mozzarella cheese. They both turned out good. Well, I assume they did. He wouldn't taste mine and I wouldn't taste his. It is Mother's Day after all so in my opinion he should have conceded. At least he did the dishes though!

Here is MY recipe:

5 whole eggs

1 cup milk

1.5 cups shredded cheese(I used mozzarella)

3/4 package thawed spinach

handful chopped onion

Stir it up. Dump it into a frozen pre-made pie crust in aluminum pan.

Cook at 350 for almost an hour.

Stab it with a butter knife. If it is gooey it needs more time.

Yummola!!!!

Outside the box(es)

Switch day is coming soon!

This is how my six year old views moving. We switch to another house. Playing with boxes and the excitement of a new home to explore is great for a kid. Not so great for a mom who keeps misplacing homeschool supplies in an effort not to pack them, tries to fix a meal realizing she packed some now essential kitchen utensil.

Moving also brings the not so startling revelation that we have too much stuff. Way too much. So far I have sneakily taken five boxes of still usable but unnecessary things to Goodwill.

No one has noticed.

If my family realized what I was doing they would go into ''rescue'' mode. ''NO! Not that! I need that!" came their anguished cries last time we moved. I wasn't smart enough then to get rid of stuff undetected. This time around I am much wiser. While my husband is at work I take my daughter to Grandma's then I go home and get to work. If it is buried in the back of a closet or bottom of the toy box I have no mercy. If it is still in the box since the last move my decision making is even easier.

The stuff left over after packing is either essentials or expendables. Yesterday I found one legged Barbie, three stuffed animals, socks that didn't match and two umbrellas. If no one is here to plead their case for their belongings then its fate rests in my hands. Here in Nebraska I have about as much need for two umbrellas as I do a one legged Barbie.

Goodwill here I come. Again.

LOST AND FOUND

*POOF*

That is apparently what happened to my writer mojo last month. Not just writer's block mind you but full fledged missing in the middle of the night disappearance. Sigh. I spent days staring at my laptop to no avail. Then I moved on to books about writing hoping that would help. It didn't. I decided to read something to distract me so I read the first three of the four Twilight books. Teenage vampires and angst was certainly a distraction and made me very glad that my highschool years are far behind me.

I was going to start looking on the back of milk cartons or Craigslist for my mojo then last night I got a ransom note from my subconscious. "Write" it said. Anything. One word. One crappy sentence. So this post is paying the ransom.

I hope it is enough.

I miss my mojo.

Fight or Flight?

I am not real thrilled with air travel these days. Long security lines, lost baggage, fees for baggage that won't make it to your destination with you and really I could go on and on. Anyone who has flown recently has seen the effect of the airlines charging for the first bag. People try to cram way too much in their carry on bags which overload the overhead compartments and all the readjusting of the bags causes much longer boarding and unboarding time.
I am seriously contemplating driving instead of flying next vacation. Yeah, it is that bad when I would rather be stuck in a vehicle with my chatty six year old, sulking sixteen year old and OCD husband.
To conserve money and my sanity we will probably vacation closer to home. Perhaps if enough consumers do the same the airlines will change some of their practices. Until then I will have to consult a map and see exactly what is within five hours of me because that is about my vehicular sanity limit.

I Don't Remember Singing a Consent Form!

I don't remember giving permission but I must have. I know I didn't sign a form or say ''Hey, you can talk down to me." but I allowed it and by allowing it once it paves the way for it to continue and of course it has.

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. Eleanor Roosevelt


I am rather easy going and usually optimistic so the first few comments I let slide. Chalking it up to them having a bad day, misinterpretation or whatever. I didn't take it personally. In hindsight I should have. Nip it in the bud as Barney Fife used to say. I almost stopped participating in an activity I really enjoyed because of this person but then had a revelation. I felt bad because I allowed myself to feel bad and just because I am a Christian does not mean I always have to turn the other cheek. It is ok to let someone know they are rude or out of line.
I feel so much better about the situation now that I have decided to not be passive or worry about a confrontation making for an awkward situation.
I am signing my own permission slip and taking my self esteem on a field trip. I am not going to let condescending or rude remarks slide anymore.
I feel better already.

Waking From a NIghtmare : Google Interprets My Dream

My heart was pounding; I could feel the blood pulsing in my ears as I lay there in the dark trying to will my panic to subside. Deep breaths. There will be no counting sheep after this one. Even if I could go back to sleep I wouldn’t want to. I was puzzled. I am an adult, why on Earth am I having a nightmare? I thought I was too old for scary dreams. Was it the blue corn chips and peach mango salsa I had before bed? I knew it had a negative impact on my diet. Perhaps it had a negative psychological impact on me as well!
Dreams usually fade and drift away like breaths on a cold winter day soon after waking up but not this time. This dream was so intense and vivid I decided to do some Googling. Let me start off by saying I do not usually buy into hocus pocus, new agey stuff like dream interpretation. That aside, my curiosity was mounting and I was wide awake anyway so I might as well see what my sleeping self was trying to tell me (if anything).
First I suppose I should at least attempt to describe the dream to you although doing so is like trying to describe how being in another country feels and smells different to someone who has never traveled.
It is evening and I am not at home but outside of a restaurant or store. I am standing in the parking lot and realize I am Renee Zellweger. I am still dreaming but I am simultaneously trying to figure out why I am Renee Zellwegger. I don’t even like her that much and we most certainly are of no physical resemblance. A team of very large dark brown horses go by pulling a red and white wagon that is a cross between a box car and the circus wagon on the front of a box of animal crackers. I am taken by the fact that these horses are unusually large. Unnaturally large and the people driving the team of horses are not people but just very people-like. It hits me that they are from another world.
Aliens!
Then the horses breathe fire. They do not set anything on fire. This seems to be more of a show of strength and power than anything else since the fire was not aimed at anyone or anything.
I begin to run in the opposite direction towards home. I am feeling glad I can run and not the Scooby Doo cartoonish running in place that I have dreamed of before. I run over a small hill and come to where I live in the dream, a trailer park near a lake. All of my neighbors are outside and look up when I start to yell and tell them we are being invaded by aliens. None of them believe me.
Is it because I am Renee Zelwegger? I am feeling very frightened. I start to protest when a train begins to descend the hill although there are no tracks. The train goes into the lake and can be sensed tunneling under the trailer park towards town. My neighbors are befuddled that I was right about the aliens but are not scared because there seemed to be no aggression on the part of the aliens.
Exhausted I go home and lock the doors. I fall asleep spent and scared but awake in the morning cold, shivering, realizing all of the doors are open. I go to open the door and my Dad comes to the door (it must be Renee’s dad because mine passed away ten years ago and looked nothing like this guy) I tell him we must leave. He says he won’t. I told him I am leaving then because I know it is not safe. He holds up an unfamiliar key and says “You aren’t going anywhere. They’ve changed all the locks.’’
That is when I woke up. Surely it is not as frightening when you are wide awake at your computer in the safe surrounds of your own home and you are most likely not Renee Zellweger but at the time I was spooked. Google never fails me and it had a lot to say about interpreting the symbols in my dream:

Parking lot signifies a hectic daily life, lack of time or the need to find a niche
Actor/Actress means I yearn to be recognized and my work acknowledged.
Horses mean power, mystery and the unknown.
Fires mean a lot of things such as anger, transformation, energy, drive, enlightenment
Aliens mean escaping reality and feeling invaded or disrespected
Running means I am not facing my fears
Trains can signify conformity, what you are burdened with, need for power or lost track of goals
Lake means restricted emotions; a disturbed lake signifies emotional turmoil
Locked doors mean opportunities denied
Father signifies the need for more self reliance

So to sum things up I am too busy but haven’t found my niche which is why I haven’t received the accolades I crave. My future is unknown but I have energy and I am transforming. Recently I have worked with people who do make me feel disrespected and my ‘’turf’’ was compromised. I have a habit of not facing my fears, I have not kept my goals in sight which has lead to emotional turmoil and denied opportunities which could have all been avoided if I would just buck up and be a little more self reliant.
Hmmmm…..now that dream is no longer scary. Still interesting and food for thought: just not mango peach salsa before bed from now on. Thanks Google for shedding some light on this.

My apologies to Renee Zellweger.

Gimme Gimme Gimme

When my kids go with me to the store they keep a keen eye out and if they spot her we immediately change course and head directly for her. The SAMPLE LADY! What is it about getting a little sample of food that thrills them? Ok, sometimes it thrills me too. My family thinks I am a crappy cook but I bet I could set up a toaster oven in aisle 12 and they would fight each other for whatever I dished into the mini disposable cup for them!

Tonight instead of writing what I was supposed to I was randomly surfing through blogs and came across a few that had free samples. I am weary of this, especially magazine subscriptions but I checked out two of them and they seem to be okey dokey.

http://instoresnow.walmart.com/In-Stores-Now-Free-Samples-And-Trials.aspx free samples mailed to you from the evil empire and also

http://www.helpgrowyoursoup.com/ this is Campbell's soup company. They will send you a packet of free tomato seeds.

Cool.

I will grow some tomatoes to cook with. I will serve the food in little disposable cups to my kids and I am sure if they think I am the Sample Lady they will say ''gimme, gimme, gimme''

PART II - FINALLY A WII FOR MII

(continued from Finally a Wii for Mii)

I was beginning to doubt this purchase but continued on and entered the training mode. This mode consists of four areas : Yoga, Strength Training, Aerobics and Balance Games. You can choose either a male or female trainer. They both have a pony tail and neither one moves their mouth while they instruct you. I selected my oddly robotic, animated , ventriloquist(?) trainer who guided me through two push ups until I quit that section due to lack of upper arm strength and audience heckling.
Onward to aerobics! The hula hoop game is fun and is a good workout. Your feet have to stay planted on the balance board and rotate your hips so I can see where this could be a strain on the knees. There is a couple of running games. One can only be played with two players so I did the single player short run. Holding the controller I ran on the carpet and not on the balance board. The controller (which had come with the Wii and not the Wii Fit) has sensors or magic fairy dust that send the information to the Wii about my pace . How did it do that? I was starting to like the Wii Fit again even if it did call me obese.
Still not moving her mouth ,my trainer then guided me through some yoga poses. She demonstrated putting her right foot on her left thigh to begin the tree pose. She doesn’t suggest modification as my real life, mouth moving yoga instructor does. Barring a horrific car accident my right foot is not going to rest on my upper left thigh so I put it on my calf instead. Good enough. The Wii Fit then gives displays an on screen graph of how my balance was. The goal is to maintain your balance and keep your red dot on the screen within the large yellow circle. The graph showed maniacal red scribbles that looked like the work of a serial killer with a red Sharpie. The Wii Fit then tells me I need to work on my balance. At least it didn’t call me obese again!
The Wii Fit has a bank for each player (you can have up to ten players) that tracks the minutes played. These minutes can unlock other games and activities when enough points are accumulated. There are charts and graphs to track weight, BMI and minutes of use. I can see this being a very motivational tool.
Will I give up my gym membership now?
No way! I personally need feedback, especially when beginning a new activity. Performing an exercise correctly avoids injury but once a person has the correct form the Wii Fit can be a great supplement or diversion. Without earning the extra points to unlock additional games the forty activities on the Wii Fit are enjoyable and varied enough to keep me coming back for more.
What’s not to love? Well, there are a couple things that I wasn’t thrilled with such as each player you add must go through the lengthy set up and changing players is not simple or quick. Doing push ups with my hands on the balance board was uncomfortable but that might just take some getting used to. I was not surprised that the Wii Fit called me obese; it was a blow to the ego though. I admit it is motivating to see how much lower I can get my BMI. The biggest drawback to the Wii Fit is that the player must be barefoot on the balance board. For people with bad feet I can see this being a problem. I have heel fasciitis so I know I am going to have to be careful about how much time I spend barefoot on the balance board but I can easily change activities, put my shoes on and do the running or strength training so it is not a deal breaker.
Would I recommend the Wii Fit? Sure I would but right now I am in ‘’crush’’ mode. Everything is new and exciting. We will see if the Wii Fit holds my interest and goes into ‘’long term relationship’’ mode or if it gets relegated to the basement which is the dungeon for my dumped and damaged fitness equipment.
Stay tuned and toned!

Finally! A Wii for Mii!

After patiently waiting for a Wii Fit for months I finally have one. Wii Fit is a very popular game system from Nintendo that retails for approximately $95.00 or at least that is how much it cost at a nearby Game Stop store in Omaha, Nebraska. The Wii Fit is sold separately from the Wii game system. They do this because they make more money that way and because there is no shortage of consumers (like me) who snap up all the nifty plastic coated electronics that they just have to have!
I could say that I politely thanked my husband when he brought it home to me but truth be told I gleefully ripped that sucker out of his hands. I had the Wii Fit box opened in no time. I could hardly conceal my excitement as I emptied it of the batteries, balance board, game disc and two instruction manuals.
Uh oh. Two manuals? My butterflies sank in my chunky tummy. Darn it. I wanted to play it NOW.
I flipped through them. They were only a bit thick due to being printed in three different languages. Ok, it is not so bad. Easy enough instructions and within ten minutes I was ready to set up and play.
Hmmmm…. Why is my husband still sitting recliner? Oh God! He plans on watching this all unfold like some sort of cellulite beholden opera but instead of the fat lady singing she is going exercise. I will exercise in front of strangers at the gym but not my husband! This is a fate worse that public flatulence (pet peeve #2 right under exercising in front of my spouse)
He says he paid for it; he wants to see if it was worth the money. I didn’t feel like sulking or arguing with him and at this point I am still excited about having a Wii Fit so I just continue on. Create my Mii character. Short, chunky and spunky I named my Mii character Mommii. Next I clicked through a bunch of screens about how important balance and posture are. Blah, blah, blah. I want to play! Let’s get to the fun stuff.
First though it wants to do a body test. Height, age, balance. Okey dokey. Moving along now. Then it weighed me and gave my BMI. My husband hasn’t known my weight for seven years. Wisely, he sat silent. The Wii however was not silent. Did this thing just groan at me? Complete with sound effects it proclaimed me to be obese. No kidding! That is why we bought it! The Wii Fit then compiles all of the information from this set up and gives you your Wii Fit Age. I am beginning to not like this thing!

…..PART II WILL CONTINUE TOMORROW……

Downward Dog Tired

This afternoon was my third foray into the world of yoga. My mat is not nearly as noxious today as it has been airing out. My toenails are painted purple in hopes of giving me something more aesthetically pleasing to reach for whilst attempting the ‘’forward full’’ yoga stretch. I am noticing small improvements in my poses. Nothing to shout about mind you but I do have a sense of being a bit more flexible. I still can’t place both hands on the mat while standing unless you count after class when I have picked up my mat and am rolling it up.
This third session had pretty much the same cast as characters as the first session: the ultra limber instructor, stretchy double jointed participants on trendy mats, my sidekick neighbor friend and myself. I did notice a new gal who was right there with me in the chunky department. Cool, I thought as I spied her in the mirrored wall. Having someone else in class who is not a Barbie prototype was refreshing. As class began I would spot her in the mirror occasionally. She might have been new to that class but obviously was not new to yoga. This gave me a good shot in the arm of some she-can-do-it-you-can-too medicine which I needed.
We gently went through the poses that I was now at least a little familiar with such as downward dog, sunflower, chair, child, and upward dog. I was feeling the flow. I stretched, taking deep breaths, envisioning myself as a yogette or whatever yoga folks are called. I suppose it is obvious that I am not one since I don’t even know what they are called but for today I will use yogette. Then we were instructed to firmly plant one foot and flow into the tree pose. We were to stand on one foot and place the other foot against our calf (or thigh if you were really yogariffic). I planted my foot and place my other foot on my calf, looked in the mirror and lost it. Where is my meditative groove? My Zen had zoomed and I was trying to hold it together but my chunky self staring back at me in the mirror was humming ‘’I’m a lumberjack and I’m ok”. Deep breath. Tree pose. No good. I am not even a huge Monty Python fan so I don’t know where that came from but it kept popping back into my mind. I lost my balance and try as I might I couldn’t get it back to hold the tree pose for longer than five seconds. Every time I wobbled or saw my friend wobble I wanted to yell ‘’timber”! I may be new but I am observant enough to know that type of behavior would be frowned upon in yoga class. Hmmm…perhaps I didn’t air my mat out enough after all. I think I will blame it on the plastic fumes.
Yoga is hard work. I leave the classes tired but refreshed. I think I will go to class number four later this week. I will keep you posted.

The other day (last week) I bought new beverage glasses. I thought it was time the Walker family graduated to glass glasses instead of the plastic ones. Sure we have two kids and I am rather clumsy but none the less I wanted them. Generally I am an optimist and believe that the glass is half full.

It usually is!

As a mommy-optimist though I know that the half full glass is left next to the computer where there is not supposed to be any food or drink and that it isn't discovered until after the kids have already gone to bed.

That is Mommydom for you.

I can handle washing the glasses but ever since the glasses were taken out of their box it has sat there waiting to be taken out. At first I believed I was having a stand off of sorts with my teenaged son and husband but then realized a stand off is not a stand off if no one notices you are having one.

So am I to just let that box sit there on the counter? Not exactly. For now it is where I am hiding my stash of bought-too-early-eating-it-anyway Easter candy.

Mmmmmmm...mmmmm chocolate.

Not very Mommylike of me to have candy and not share, huh?

Naaah....serves them right!

YOGA Part II

I don't know how much I enjoyed my first yoga class but I did enjoy how I felt afterwards so this morning I took another class. Taught by a different instructor and surrounded by different (yet still less chunkier than I) people but that wasn't the only thing different. I came prepared! I had a crocheted headband and funky, new agey yoga mat with matching carrying case. Yeah, I'm the stuff. I am into Yoga!

Then the class started.

I proudly unfurled my new mat. Eww. It still smelled of that funky new rubber smell. I had aired it out but obviously not enough. Every stretch and pose that brought my face close to my mat had to kill brain cells. I was beginning to wonder if I was going to make it through class without a contact high.

This session was much more difficult. I was introduced to stretches that not only seemed impossible but likely to be illegal in the more Southern conservative states. The instructor did not just calmly call out poses and directions from her mat at the front of the room. She walked around and gave encouragement or correction. Some of the poses such as warrior, child and chair were included but there were other elements that I have still blocked out at this time.

Perhaps after psychotherapy I will remember what exactly I was doing to have all the muscles in my legs quaking. Seriously, my legs were shaking like cellulite driven jackhammers. After class I was completely fatigued and refreshed at the same time. Almost how you feel after a good cry. Red faced, snotty , worn out but yet relieved.

As I walked over to where I had laid my belongings I seriously considered not bending over to retrieve them but to just go to the store to buy new things when my legs were working again.

Bad Dog?

Impulsiveness has gotten me into some not so great situations but other times I benefit from it. Yesterday it actually did me a lot of good. Coming back from a three day weekend out of town my friend called and asked if I wanted to try a yoga class at 5:00 pm. It was 3:00pm and I was pretty close to home. I quickly said yes since I had eaten badly all weekend. I didn't consider that lack of sleep and being bloated from eating out for three days might just not mix with a new exercise class. I just said yes impulsively. Almost as soon as I hung up with her we ran into road construction. I didn't want to call her back and cancel after I already said yes. It took a half an hour longer to drive home than I expected. I had time to run inside change clothes and drive to the gym with less than five minutes to spare before the class started.

The first thing I noticed was that everyone else had a cute little yoga mat. Sigh. I grabbed one of the used to be squishy exercise mats that people have been sweating on for years and tried not to gag. While I wasn't exactly out of place the second thing I noticed was that there is a yoga type style of clothing that everyone wore. Not quite the same as the sweats and t shirt I threw on. I doubt anyone noticed or cared that I was wearing my favorite Incredible Hulk t shirt but it was incongruous with the meditative groove I was trying to get going on. The third thing I noticed was that I was the largest person there. It didn't make me feel self conscious but it made me wonder why there were no other chunky gals there. Then we started and I immediately realized why there were no chunky people there. Yoga is hard. The slowness and gracefulness of it hides how stinking difficult those poses are. When I say graceful I am of course referring to the other people because I felt about as graceful as a cement mixer on prom night.

I wasn't familiar with the poses such as cobra and child pose. I had to crane my neck and watch the instructor who by the way seemed to be made of different material than I. She could bend and twist easier than over cooked pasta.

Despite its difficulty the class time went by fast. When it was over I asked the instructor about a pose that I can neither spell nor pronounce and she happily showed me how to do it. After class I felt good. Relaxed. I was sweaty but not like I just took an aerobics class. This morning I swear I feel taller. The next class is Thursday and I plan on taking it. First though I will leave my Hulk shirt and home and stop by the store and get a yoga mat and some yoga type clothes. In the meantime I will practice my chair pose and downward dog.

LOOK IT UP

Some days bedtime just can't come soon enough. Being a stay at home mom and a homeschooler is a never ending list of chores assignments , standoffs and questions. I am tired and my patience tends to wear thin around 8:00 pm. My six year old daughter has developed quite the repertoire of bedtime stalling tactics. These days after the correct stuffed animal has been chosen, the right un-itchy pajamas are on and teeth are brushed we read a book or two and then lights out.

That is when the questions start. Not easy questions mind you. Hard ones. Her sweet lisping questions coming through the gap where her two front teeth used to be. ''How do babies get in the mommies tummy?" " What is the stuff octopus' squirt out'' and the like. Sigh. Why can't we tackle this subject matter in the morning? I try to encourage her to remember her questions for the morning and we can find a book on it or look it up on the internet. A few nights ago she asked me why we don't know when people are going to die. I gently explained to her that none of us know how many days we have and that only God knows the answer to that.

Her sweet little reply made me smile. ''Can't we just go to God.com and look it up?"

If only everything was that easy!

WOE IS MII

I am not your typical tech and electronics hound that must have the newest phone, Ipod, laptop or game console but I was curious about the Wii. Media coverage of this popular video game system was extensive. I read and heard about it everywhere but had resisted for months even looking at it in the stores. Christmas shopping season heralded a new wave of Wii interest and it seemed to be on many people's Christmas wish list. My desire for a Wii did not fully bloom until I heard so many people talking about it after the holiday season. Now I wanted one. Badly. So does everyone else. Often sold out and never found on sale I finally forked out the bucks for a Wii. Whee! It was fun! Easy to set up (I just asked my teenager to do it) and everyone in the family enjoys playing it too.

I am on a perpetual diet and I love the Wii so the next logical conclusion was; ''I must get a Wii Fit". Easier said than done. I visit the stores trying to time it when they say the delivery trucks come but so far no luck. Unable to ''pre-buy'' it at the store and it is sold out online.

I am having a hard time being patient. I have heard and read so many great things about the Wii Fit that I can't wait to get my pudgy little hands on one.

Wheels!

One of the advantages of buying a new car is reliability. Or so I thought. To say I was shocked and dismayed yesterday when my one year old car broke down is a gross understatement. Timing is everything of course so this happened when my husband's car was in getting an oil change , my 16 year old son was with me (and didn't leave his car keys at home), one friend was out of town and another was working. Wow. February in Nebraska is not exactly the best time of year to walk home. Thankfully my friend's husband came to get us so we could pick up my husbands car. (Thanks Bill!)

My car is still under warranty so certainly it will be fixed but I was bummed none the less so later that evening my husband took me on a pity trip to Target. While walking aimlessly through the aisles looking at stuff we don't need my eyes spied a bike. A pretty purple bike. A Schwinn. ON CLEARANCE! I flagged down the first Target employee I saw and had him get the bike down for me. He said he didn't think the price was correct so he scanned it. It was correct. A ladies 26 inch Schwinn for $48.00. Come to momma! The red clearance stickers showed the price at $199.00 then $136.00 then $99.00 and now $48.00.

What a deal.

What a steal!

My new purple bike waits patiently in the garage for Spring to come to Nebraska so I can try out my new wheels!

BUTT BREAD

There are many kids who refuse to eat the crust off their bread. Maybe if it was called something other than ''crust'' it might sound a bit more appealing. My two kids will eat the crust but the are adamant about not eating the ''butt bread''. The ends of the loaf is comprised of the same ingredients and baked in the same pan as the rest of the loaf but that argument falls on deaf ears. They will not touch it. My mother always called it the ''heel'' of the loaf. Another not exactly appetizing term.

Sometimes I turn the heel to the inside when making sandwiches. I rarely get away with that one with my teenaged son but my six year old daughter is still more hungry than observant when it comes to her food. I tried making croutons with the butt bread but that didn't turn out so well. Maybe there is a crouton recipe. I thought it was just stale toast. Butt bread is good for French onion soup. Just submerge it and cover it with some cheese. I haven't been caught at that one yet.

I keep a bread bag in my freezer and throw the butt bread in it each time I open a new loaf. I hate to waste perfectly good bread but I am not exactly willing to eat it either. For now I plan on keeping in the freezer until Spring when the kids and I can take it and feed the ducks when they come back to the local pond. They will love it, even if it is butt bread

Gear It In Gear

My son has been driving for a mere three months now but he learned on an automatic transmission. He is a good driver and a good kid so when he asked to trade in his ''granny car'' for one more befitting to a sixteen year old boy I had to think about it long and hard. With gas prices having such unpredictable mood swings switching to a more economical car might not be a bad idea. Having a smaller car might be easier to navigate in Omaha's traffic as well as parking lots.

The granny car was rather large and boatish so when an opportunity came up to buy a friend's car who was in the service and deploying to another country I told my son if he could sell his granny car then he could buy the sporty little car. His eyes lit up and he immediately got into high gear. He made flyers and posted them around town then he took pictures of his car and made a posting on Craigslist putting it up for sale. The granny car sold quickly and before our friend was ready to release the ownership of his car so my son used that time to read about stick shifts on the internet and watch You Tube videos on how to drive a stick.

I was skeptical and thought we were still going to have at least a week of frustrating, lurching, engine killing lessons. I was wrong. Sure he killed the engine a few times (five, but who is counting?) but withing two days my son was confidently on the road in a five speed Mitsubishi.

I am pretty impressed with how much he learned before he got behind the wheel and I think we are both very pleased with how it paid off.

Is Captian Chelsey ''Sully'' Sullenberger an athiest?

The miraculous flight 1549 landing in the Hudson River with no lives lost is not considered miraculous by all. Many atheist groups are trying to count the heroic Captain in their ranks. Much is being said about Sully's answer to a question posed by Katie Couric in an interview.

"Did you, at any point, pray?"
It seemed to be the only question that surprised Sullenberger, who had taken his plane from a normal take-off through a disasterous bird-strike that killed both engines to ditching in a frigid river in less than five minutes. His answer:
I would imagine somebody in the back was taking care of that for me while I was flying the airplane.

He has not professed any thanks to God for his life and the other 155 people on the plane. If he is a Christian he missed out on some great opportunity to praise God. If he is an atheist he doesn't seem to want to broadcast that. Perhaps he is not inclined to indicate his faith or lack of to the throngs of media who have been following him since this incident. He might just think it is none of our business.

What intrigues me most though is not whether or not he is a believer. I want to know how Katie Couric earns millions of dollars a year and doesn't ask this guy a follow up question.

What's Up Doc?

Seriously, What's up Doc? I just got out of the hospital yesterday afternoon after a weekend I would love to forgot but doubt that I will anytime soon. Numerous tests were done with no definitive answer as to what was wrong with me. The best guess the staff has is food poisoning.

Even if I didn't get answers I did get great care. The doctors and nurses were wonderful and the hospital was clean. I can't complain about the food since I didn't get any while I was there but the saltines the nurse snuck to me on the side were delicious.

Ironic that I had just written an article on safe lunch ideas for kids given the peanut butter recalls. Not that we know it was the peanut butter that almost did me in but still it makes me wonder.

Here is a link to my article just in case you are interested: http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/1407905/peanut_free_lunch_box_ideas.html?cat=25

How Nifty!

Those who practice the home arts are a dying breed. My grandmother canned stuff. I don't really remember what. Maybe jelly. I remember that she canned things though. She embroidered and entered her homemade goods in the county fair. Not too many people make anything anymore. Storebought is easier and faster. Does anyone outside of Nebraska even use the term ''storebought'' anymore? Usually people think it is better to buy it. The fabric section at Wal-Mart keeps getting smaller and seems with the exception of the very trendy scrapbookers there isn't much that is cool about making things yourself. My friend introduced me to the Knifty Knitter and I'll tell you it is rather nifty indeed. It comes with an instruction book but I found it easier to learn from watching my friend and there are also many videos on You Tube with instructions. With the Knifty Knitter one can make hats, scarves, ponchos, throws and even socks. For my first project I made my 16 year old son a hat. It didn't take that long and wasn't all that difficult. I spent about 4 dollars on yarn. It took me several hours split up over a few days but I think as I get used to doing this it will become quicker and easier to finish a project. Could I have saved a bit of time and bought him another hat at the store? Sure I could have but I have to say that I was thrilled when he liked it and wore it. Homemade is pretty cool after all. Next up a hat for my daughter. She insists on pink yarn of course.

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! It's A Secret!

Actually it is a bunch of secrets that aren't really secrets anymore. Confused? I am referring to http://www.postsecret.blogspot.com/. People mail in their secrets on a postcard to the bloggers address they might get it published. Thousands of secrets have been mailed in. The website is updated every Sunday with new secrets and several books of the secrets have been published.

I don't know why I am drawn to this website. Each week I check it and it invariably conjures up a variety of emotions. It is kind of like rubber necking on the highway when you see someone on the side of the road. Arrested? Broken down? Accident? It is just curiosity I suppose. Like coming upon an accident scene, I hope everyone is alright and I move along. It is odd that so many people have so many deep dark secrets. Not that I am an open book. I certainly am not. I don't tell everyone one everything but if you put all the people I know in one room then collectively they know everything there is to know about me. I don't particularly see secrets as a good thing. I figure everyone has a past, their own dirty laundry so to speak or they have been in similar situations as myself at some point in their life. I guess if I had a secret so deep and dark that I felt I truly could tell no one I would just tell God. He would already know anyway!

I Don't Like Negativity

I don't like negativity especially when it comes to the temperature. I have many errands that I simply cannot put off today. The pharmacy to get my thyroid medication, the post office to mail a birthday gift, the grocery store for well, groceries and the gym. Normally I don't mind having to run to a few different places around town but today I am dreading it. It is MINUS ELEVEN outside. Seeing as how it is January and I live in Nebraska one might think I should be used to this. Cold is one thing, bitter cold is another but minus eleven with the additional horrid windchill makes it an Arctic blasting cold that I just have a hard time dealing with.

Brrrr.

Life isn't just about me though so as I sat here in my warm house delaying my errands because of the weather I thought about those who would gladly trade places with me. The homeless shelters are at capacity and it is not supposed to warm up for a couple more days. I gathered some extra blankets, a couple coats, mittens and scarves and the first place I am heading is the Open Door Mission in Omaha where these items are in high demand.

I feel warmer already.

CLICKETY CLICKETY CLICKETY

I love the feel of my fingers flying over my laptop. The clickety sound of my writers block temporarily dissipated. I love to write. I get that from my mom. She is a prolific poet and writer. Published hundreds of times in various places especially Fence Posts and Lutheran Digest. Many more to be sure. Her mother wrote too. I hope my children write someday. They can pay me back for all the blogs I have written about them. I recently have made my foray into the professional freelancing world. I have a true blue professional writer friend who told me that once you get paid for something no matter how little the pay or small the article is I can now consider myself a professional. (Thanks Tamsen!) I must be a writer, I have the rejection slips to prove it! They don't slow me down though. Clickety, clickety I am working on my next story/article/project. Along with my blogs and submissions I mail out I have been submitting articles online to Associated Content (and getting paid I happily report). You can see my content here http://www.associatedcontent.com/user/380549/sandy_walker.html

I will improve with time and experience. I don't take rejection or constructive criticism to heart. I am having a great time to boot!

I WON!

At the beckoning of my cousin Nancy Joy I joined the Goodreads site. At first I didn't think the site itself was that interesting or useful but once I toyed around with it a bit I like having virtual bookshelves to catalog the books I have read and more importantly the books I want to read.

Sometimes I hear of a good book but then when I am at the library or bookstore I can't recall any of the titles I was interested in. Goodreads also has authors as well as reviews that anyone can write about a book. I was exploring the site and noticed they have giveaways. A person can sign up to win an advance copy of a book. Of course this is in hopes that you in turn will post a review of that book on the Goodreads site.

I shot off an email to my cousin to see if she had signed up for any book giveaways and she had not. Within a week or two after signing up she won a book. Sorry, I can't remember the title but she is an avid reader so she has probably already chewed up that book. I kept entering the giveaways and I finally won.

Yeah me!

Today the UPS guy delivered my book. Eve: A Novel of the First Woman by Elissa Elliott. Perfect timing too. The weather is incredibly crappy with near ground blizzard conditions. I can stay inside and cuddle up on the couch with my prize. I hope it is a good one but either way I will post a review, it is the least I can do for getting a free book.

What's New?

I am one of those people who love to try new stuff. You never know if you are going to find a new favorite shampoo, restaurant, detergent etc. It drives my anal retentive , regimented husband crazy. He loathes when I rearrange the furniture so a new food is not met with enthusiasm much less an open mind.

Sometimes we find a new family favorite such as the delicious Dellalo calamata olives. Way better than the Marzetti's brand that we tried prior to this. They are awesome. Some things slip by unnoticed like the dishwasher detergent tablets. Of course that could be due to the fact that I am the only one entrusted with the secret knowledge of dishwasher loading. It is becoming a lost art!

Of course there are the duds. Fiber One Frosted Shredded Mini Wheats were ok-ish if you didn't mind an odd coating on the roof of your mouth but the Fiber One Caramel Delight cereal was not delightful at all. GAK! Is the sound I made after my one and only bite. Truly heinous breakfast food is no way to start the day. Another purchase I won't repeat is the Chap Stick true shimmer, peppermint flavor. Yes, it shimmers but it also casts a bluish tint on my lips. So much so that I looked oxygen deprived. I got some very concerned looks at the gym.

Despite the products that miss the mark I still keep my eye out for new things to try at the store and my husband still grits his teeth as I unload my new finds on the kitchen counter when I get home.

READY, AIM, FIRE!

I only went because my teenaged son asked me to. I did not expect to have a good time. A shooting range? Guns? Camouflage wearing NRA freaks? What was I getting myself into? We drove to the local shooting range called appropriately enough The Bullet Hole. Once we stepped inside I immediately saw that my preconceived notions of the place were way off the mark. Very clean and well organized there were racks and racks of various firearms and all the accessories one might need to carry, clean and personalize them. I facetiously asked if they had a gun that was pink or purple, maybe one with flowers. A feminine one I told them. The helpful guy behind the counter (in a dress shirt and khakis, no camo) informed me that they had a lavender gun that was just sold in the past couple days. No kidding.

My son brought in his pellet gun and I was going to rent a hand gun for six bucks but didn't realize I needed a permit to do so. Bummer. We should have called first. My son and I decided to share his pellet gun so now we needed targets. My son bought the typical bulls eye target for a measly fifty cents. I picked out the mobster guy target for a buck. Then because I obviously left my filter in the off position I grabbed the target and said ''Good, I really want to shoot a guy!" Yes, this garnered many concerned looks from staff and shoppers alike. OOPS! So we slink off to the range and pin up our target. Even with the rented ear protection it was loud. BANG! BANG! BANG! After a few minutes though it didn't seem as loud. We had a great time and surprisingly I was not a bad shot. I think I am going to apply for that permit and take my son there again. We had a great time and it was nice to do something together that was his idea. It won't be too long before he is grown and out of the house so I need to grab whatever bonding opportunities come my way, fully loaded or not.

I DON'T DESERVE THIS HEADACHE

I certainly did not do anything of interest to acquire my headache. POUND POUND POUND

It is just there. Appearing this afternoon around 4pm. Darn it. I don't drink, smoke or party. I was in bed by 9pm and slept through the ringing in of the new year. Through the pounding I pondered what I could do to rid myself of the incessant POUND POUND POUND. I cleaned my glasses and took two Aleve. The label says to start with one so I am sure two is the correct dosage. POUND POUND POUND it has been forty minutes and still no relief. Damn. Sorry, DAR
N. No, this really hurts and is annoying. Let's leave it at damn. I took 3 aspirin and drank a cup of milk with a few crackers. I don't need a stomach ache to boot. Twenty minutes later I am down to a THROB THROB THROB. I feel a sense of hope. I take a steamy hot shower to relax. Clean my glasses again and drink some diet Coke for the caffeine. Now I am down to more of a strong poke in my frontal lobe. POKE POKE POKE. Four hours in and I still have it. Did someone with a new year's hangover wish it away and it landed on me? Cool pack on the head for a few minutes barely abates it. PULSE PULSE PULSE . Crap. I give in. I am going to bed and I am taking my headache with me.